Awkward Moments.

Meeting someone new almost always comes with small talk. And one of the first questions is nearly always:

“Do you have kids?”

My answer is simple: “We have three.”

If the conversation stays light, no one ever knows how complicated that answer really is.

But when the questions keep coming, that’s when the awkwardness sneaks in.

“How old are the kids?”

“Where are they right now?”

“How long have you been married?”

And eventually…

“Oh…wait…so you’re not their mom?”

That’s the moment my shoulders tense. The moment I feel out of place. The moment the truth feels exposed…I’m a childless stepmom.

I don’t have kids of my own. All of my experience as a parent comes from stepping into this role, loving kids I didn’t give birth to, showing up for a family I didn’t start, and building a life that doesn’t quite fit the “traditional” mold.

And while I love my stepkids deeply, being a childless stepmom adds a unique layer of complication. There are times I feel like an outsider in my own family. Times I wonder if I’m “enough” without children of my own. Times when simple small talk stings because it brushes against a tender place in my heart.

If you’ve ever felt that, please know you’re not the only one. I think most stepparents have experienced this in some way, but for childless stepmoms, it can cut a little deeper.

Sometimes people try to relate, which I genuinely appreciate. And every now and then, I meet another stepmom in conversation and suddenly, I don’t feel so alone.

Here’s the truth: we’re not strange, and our family isn’t rare. Nearly 40% of families today are blended. That means many of us are walking through the same awkward, complicated, and tender moments.

So if your chest tightens the next time someone casually asks about your kids, pause and take a breath. You’re not alone in this. Somewhere close by, there’s another stepmom, maybe even a childless stepmom, who knows exactly how it feels